Saturday, October 27, 2012

Living Art

It’s now leading into what can be considered Friday night. I’m a 30 year old woman who has decided to spend that time pondering over a quote she found on facebook this morning.

“She lives the poetry she cannot write” ~ Oscar Wilde

Now- because I may just love literature more than Hubby, I know, hands down, that was misquoted; it should read ‘HE lives the poetry HE cannot write’.
Kind of a kick in the pants considering this quote was found on a commemorative fan page called ‘Oscar Wilde’. The quote is taken from what could be considered Wilde’s most known work: The Picture of Dorian Gray.

Me and Oscar, we’re gonna party when my time is up here. I could really love that man….that is…if he wasn’t dead…and also gay. But that’s beside the point…

The meaning of that quote within its context implies that those we recognize as great poets write of the life they desire; it suggests that the great poets have not lived most of what they write. In fact, it’s the ones that live the life most would only write about that would make for a tired poet; they’re too busy living life, experiencing everything that life can offer. There’s no expression left as the expression and release happens through action and a state of being as opposed to words on a blank page. His life is, in essence, what we would normally consider beautiful poetry without having to read it in print. It’s the beauty of being. Lives that are lived in such a way, they could be considered a form of art.


Because I don’t really believe in mistakes (although I still call them that all the damn time) I would say I was meant to read: She lives the poetry she cannot write.

It provoked me, because the truth is... it happens to be  a statement that can be interpreted many different ways as it stands to the side of its original context.

The fact is, as a writer, whichever of my truths I cannot bring myself to write about and share with the outside world,  happens to be the same reoccurring truth I keep living without fail—It is destined to forever be the truth of my reality so long as I hold my story  within me. When it comes to me, one could say " She lives the poetry she cannot write" 

Imagine that.  

Sunday, October 21, 2012

Baby Steps

There comes a time where you just have to stop talking about what it is you really want to do with your life; stop dreaming about it and start working toward living it. It’s that time; the time to put an end to all the wondering over how it is I’m going to get there—and just start moving in the generally right-ish (who really ever knows) direction.

At this juncture, all I really know is that a perfect day would consist of waking up in the morning and being able to fill a blank canvas with everything that I am. A blank canvas that most would simply call a word document. Time stands perfectly still for me while I write. ...I... am perfectly still when I write.  

It’s been frustrating… to have this inner knowing, an almost unbound certainty of what is I'm meant to accomplish here, without so much of a tangible clue as to how it is I'm to go about getting there. Every once in a while I’m reminded that this is all a journey-- and if I’m unable to see the beauty in my travel, then moving through it all in a state of detached blindness has every potential to take away from the personal triumph of reaching the terrain that has been reserved for me, and only me.

I read something that really resonated with me a few days ago; it spoke volumes:

Nobody tells this to people who are beginners, I wish someone told me.
All of us who do creative work, we get into it because we have good taste.
But there's a gap.
For the first couple of years we make stuff, it's just not that good.
It's trying to be good, but it's not.
But your taste, the thing that got you into this game, is still killer.
And your work disappoints you.
A lot of people never get passed this phase, they quit.
Most people I know who do interesting, creative work went through years of this.
We know our work doesn't have this special thing that we want it to have.
We all go through this.
And if you are just starting out or you are still in this phase,
you gotta know it's normal and the most important thing you can do is do a lot of work.
Put yourself on a deadline so that every week you will finish one story.
It is only by going through a volume of work that you will close that gap,
and your work will be as good as your ambitions.
And I took longer to figure out how to do this than anyone I've ever met.
It's going to take a while.
It's normal to take a while.
You've just got to fight your way through.
~Ira Glass 

So with that said, I've decided to start closing the gap between where I am and where I’m meant to be. Satisfied by doing what I can right now and sharing the contents of my gap.

Oh, Hiya Blog!

Jen xo